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You know this person. Maybe you are this person.
Great income on paper. Impressive job title. The kind of salary that makes people assume you’ve got it all figured out. And yet, somehow, there’s nothing to show for it. The savings account is thin. The credit cards are heavy. The retirement fund is… let’s not talk about the retirement fund.
“I don’t know where it all goes.”
Said with genuine confusion. Said with a little bit of shame. Said while earning more than most people will ever see. Here’s the hard truth: money flowing through your hands is not the same as having money.
The Illusion of Wealth
We’ve been taught to measure success by income. “How much do you make?” It’s the question everyone wants to ask and nobody’s supposed to. We assume a big number means security, freedom, and options.
But income is not wealth. Cash flow is not net worth. A big paycheck can mask a very leaky bucket.
You can “make” six figures and keep almost none of it. You can out-earn your friends and still be one emergency away from panic. You can look rich and feel broke at the same time. Because what you earn is just the top of the funnel. What you keep is what actually builds a life.
Where Does It Actually Go?
If you’ve ever looked at your account and thought, “Wait, I made HOW much this year?”—you’re not alone. Here’s where it usually disappears:
Lifestyle Inflation
Your expenses rise to meet your income. Every. Single. Time. You get a raise, you upgrade the house. You hit a bonus, you take a bigger vacation. You earn more, you spend more—and somehow you’re still in the same place financially. The treadmill just got fancier.
The “Rich Person” Purchases
The boat. The luxury car. The house that’s just a little more than you should’ve bought. These aren’t wealth builders. They’re wealth destroyers dressed up in status clothing. As one person I heard put it: “I was making a lot of money, and now I’m in debt. Where’d it go? I don’t know, we leased a boat and bought a horse.” 🐴 Sounds funny. Until it’s your story.
Status Spending
This is buying things to signal success rather than build it. The designer bag. The club membership. The dinner tabs you pick up because you want people to see you as the generous one. None of it compounds. All of it leaks.
The Invisible Leaks
Subscriptions you forgot about. Upgrades you didn’t need. Conveniences that pile up so slowly you don’t notice—until you add them up and want to cry. $15 here. $50 there. It’s not dramatic. It’s just… constant.
“Emergencies” That Aren’t Really Emergencies
When there’s no margin, everything feels urgent. The car repair is a crisis. The medical bill is a catastrophe. These are predictable expenses that feel like emergencies because there’s no buffer.
The Psychology Underneath
Here’s where it gets uncomfortable. If you don’t respect money, you won’t retain it. That’s not a moral judgment. It’s a pattern. Money that doesn’t feel earned doesn’t feel worth protecting. “Easy come, easy go” becomes your financial reality.
Some people spend to feel successful rather than spending because they are successful. The purchase becomes proof. The splurge becomes a signal—to others, but mostly to yourself. But affording something and being able to actually afford it are two different things. One means the transaction clears. The other means your life gets better, not worse, because of it.
What “Keeping” Actually Means
Let me be clear: keeping isn’t financial hoarding. Hoarding is fear dressed up as discipline. It’s white-knuckling your money because you’re terrified. That’s not health; that’s just a different kind of dysfunction.
Keeping means intention.
It means spending on things that compound:
- Relationships that matter
- Health that lets you show up fully
- Skills that make you more valuable
- Assets that grow while you sleep
- Experiences that actually form you, not just impress others
The question isn’t “did I save it?” The question is: “Did I spend it on something I’ll value long-term?”
Generosity counts. Giving can be keeping—if it’s intentional, not reactive. But mindless spending? Status spending? That’s not keeping. That’s leaking.
The Reframe That Changes Everything
Stop measuring income. Start measuring retention. What percentage of what flows through your hands actually stays? Stays as savings. Stays as investments. Stays as options.
Here’s the math that should haunt you: A person earning $150k who keeps 20% is wealthier than someone earning $500k who keeps nothing. The $150k earner has $30k a year building toward something. The $500k earner has a nicer lifestyle and the same panic every time something breaks.
Who’s actually winning?
The Questions That Matter
If you’ve gotten this far, you probably already know where you stand. But let’s make it concrete:
- If you added up everything you earned in the last five years, where did it actually go?
- What do you have to show for it—not in stuff, but in security, freedom, and options?
- What’s one leak you already know about but haven’t plugged?
You can’t out-earn a leaky bucket. You can’t out-hustle bad money habits. The goal isn’t to make more. The goal is to keep more of what you make. That’s not about deprivation. It’s about intention. It’s about knowing what the money is FOR—and making sure it actually gets there.
Earn well. But more importantly? Keep well.
Avraham
Your Financial Coach
P.S. — Sound familiar? If you’re tired of watching your hard-earned money disappear and ready to start keeping more of what you make, let’s talk. Book a free session with me, and we’ll find the leaks together. It’s time to turn your income into actual wealth.
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